Friday, March 13, 2009

In which I capitulate to his insanity

My dear friend Stephen - you all remember the post about him - is at it again. The poor thing really cannot contemplate why one would find specific uses for mayo vs. Miracle Whip and vice versa. I can see that he is starting to escalate publicly about Miracle Whip. Now it's on Facebook. The innocent posters have merely responded to his MW post and he is restarting the cycle. This is like the stealth virus so I must warn you. Any emails with the word miracle or whip, placed alone or together, spelled backwards or forwards, or any letters appearing in the two words in the subject line of the email MUST I repeat MUST be deleted from your inbox. If you mistakenly open this email a virus will unfold in your computer spewing creamy, off white, tangy fatty whiteness all over your motherboard and central processing unit. It will render your computer useless unless you can remove the substance and serve it with a BLT or in a potato salad.

I understand there is a galaxy wide movement forming to interrupt the supply of MW to the stratosphere for one day. You can support this worthwhile endeavor by going to and selecting an item from the file of unique recipes. Please purchase necessary items, and prepare the recipe completing the selected dish no later than 11:55 p.m. on March 31, 2009. At one second after midnight the world will lift the dish to their mouths and consume the dish in unison with all other planetary participants. This action will interrupt the flow of MW thus creating a world devoid of the product for a 24 hour period.

For those of you too lazy to go to the site, I offer this classic. Note: To meet the 11:55 p.m. deadline on March 31, you must complete the cooking process several hours before time of consumption to allow for chilling and assembling the dish in a bread bowl.

Broccoli Dip in a Bread Bowl

1 cup MIRACLE WHIP Dressing
1 cup BREAKSTONE'S or KNUDSEN Sour Cream
1 env. GOOD SEASONS Italian Dressing Mix
1 pkg. (10 oz.) frozen chopped broccoli, thawed, well drained
1 can (8 oz.) water chestnuts, drained, chopped
1/2 cup chopped red pepper
1 loaf round sourdough bread (1 lb.)
MIX dressing, sour cream and dressing mix in large bowl until well blended. Add broccoli, water chestnuts and red pepper; mix well. Cover. Refrigerate several hours or until chilled.
CUT slice from top of bread loaf; remove center, leaving 1-inch-thick shell. Cut removed bread into bite-sized pieces.
SPOON dip into bread loaf just before serving. Serve with bread pieces, NABISCO Crackers and assorted cut-up vegetables.


  1. sounds yummy... it's nice to know the elite cooks like yourself can take the high road to a miracle!

    i would POLITELY mention that kroger sour cream and italian dressing mix suffice sufficiently, and satisfactorly.